GC52 News: Spoilers for DC Comics Released 7th/14th of June 2022.
Words in italics signify actions.
If you missed our last report, check it out here.
The GC52 Logo appears on televisions, computers, and all other types of viewing devices at its normally scheduled time. The logo stands in a black and white silhouette with a candle at the center of the screen. Below the logo reads the words “In Memoriam of the Justice League 19??-2022”. When the lights come up in the newsroom, something is different. Something fitting of a CRISIS of this magnitude. A DARK CRISIS some people on social media have dubbed it. At the desk isn’t the usual smiling face of Lead Anchor Dan but rather that of a stranger to some… a harbinger of a good time for anyone who watched the now-closed sister station GC616. Tonight… we are checking in with Chad as Dan attends a candle-lit memorial for the Justice League.
Under his bright neon blue blazer is a graphic tee with the words “I went to the Prime Earth and all I got is this lousy T-Shirt”. The viewers’ television audio picks up the distinct cracking of an ice-cold Miller High Life under the newsroom desk before the interim anchor leans down to take a sip as if he is not on interdimensional television. After a quick sip from the champagne of beer, he leans back into the seat.
Chad: What’s up Distinguished Competition! It’s me, Ya boy Chad. I’m filling in for D-Money tonight as he mourns the loss of the Justice League. Fun fact there is no hyphen between Bat and man like there is for Spider-Man… I’ve got a lot of things to adjust to. But anyway, my station closed over on my Earth after some events so Dan reached out to offer me a job here. So I’m going to be getting to know all your heroes and villains soon. I heard you’ve got a dude who’s a clown, like that’s his whole bit. Sounds like a good time. Anyway, the Justice League got capped. Rip to them.
Chad reveals his beer before pouring some out on the floor in their remembrance.
Chad: Let’s kick it over to Adam? Wait, do I know him from my Earth? Never mind.
The camera cuts to Adam on the streets of Gotham overlooking the city
Adam: After the tragic loss of one of Gotham’s greatest heroes, Bondo, and Tutors city-wide assault that GC52’s own Grace O’Halloran may have played a tiiiiiny part in, I’m live on the streets of the Hill as we track the Saints, who spent a solid three minutes in GCPD custody after they were defeated at the hands of the Batgirls. While reports are still coming in, some rumors suggest they’re chasing a small child that could be “Seer”, the hacker/terrorist who assisted in the Magistrates Fear State which recently gripped Gotham. Some eyewitnesses even claim the Batgirls are on the Saints trail but for some unknown reason, don’t seem to be intervening just yet.
In completely unrelated news, over to our now junior reporter, Grace, with a night out at Gotham’s premier winter-themed establishment, the Iceberg Lounge, which seems to be hosting a fancy night for Gotham’s richest, and even the former police commissioner’s daughter walking arm in arm with a ward of Bruce Wayne! Over to you Grace!
The camera cuts to Grace O’Halloran live on the scene at the Iceberg lounge before cutting back.
Adam: Hold on a second, did I just see one of those Saints getting kicked in the head by a Batgirl in the background? Back to the studio, while I race over to the real story!
Instead of cutting to the studio, the camera switches to Bobby and his cameraman Jeffy. The shots look a little more “low quality” for some reason, almost like a home video. The recording voice has a static-y sound to it as while Bobby and Jeffy can be heard, the sound isn’t that crisp.
Bobby: Greetings GC52! It’s been a while. We apologize as Jeffy and I had what I like to call “technical errors.” Well, we still have them, owing to the cameras we had to get…somehow. Don’t ask.
Jeffy: Would it really be technical errors? I mean we got our equipment wrecked thanks to Batman and Robin. How did he find out we were filming him?
While they’re talking B-Roll footage of the Monkey Prince starts playing before cutting back to Bobby and Jeffy.
Bobby: Let’s face it, Jeffy. Batman has had it against me ever since I said he killed the Monkey Prince (he wasn’t dead really). “Oh, but the Batarang wasn’t meant to take off his head! I wasn’t trying to kill him!” BUT YOU DID KILL HIM, BATMAN. Well, he wasn’t really killed, since he came back and we did cover some of the things he did since then, but c’mon! Anyways, we owe our dear viewers a recap: ever since the battle with what appeared to be Penguin, there have been no sightings of the Monkey Prince in Gotham! It’s like he disappeared!
Jeffy: So, what are we doing here sir?
Bobby: Good question Jeffy! You see, in the beginning, we found out that the Monkey Prince was a high school student named Marcus. It’s interesting because he had a presence in Gotham for a while and then disappeared! For a moment, we thought he was gone…until we got reports of a battle in Amnesty Bay.
Jeffy turns the camera around to show Amnesty Bay. There’s an idyllic peacefulness to it, as it is near the sea.
Jeffy: Which I don’t think led us anywhere.
Bobby: Patience Jeffy. We’re close to the sea, so if there’s no Monkey Prince sighting, maybe we could somehow try to get Aquaman’s attention?
Jeffy: And how do you do that?
Suddenly, the Monkey Prince bounces onto the scene. He’s fighting what appears to be a young woman with scarily sharp teeth and Shifu Piggy is with them.
Bobby: It’s him! It’s the Monkey Prince! And who is that?
The young woman sees Bobby and Jeffy.
Jeffy: We should go.
Jeffy runs away, taking the camera away from him.
Bobby: Wait! Before this ends, I would like to say that the Monkey Prince is at Amnesty Bay! By the sea!
Shifu Piggy appears.
Shifu Piggy: The battlefield is not a place for you, young man!
We see a poof of smoke and a loud flash. The screen goes black and the broadcast turns to static only to pick up with Terrence in New York.
Terrence: Good evening, great people of New York City and the larger universe that we inhabit. Things are taking a turn for the worse here in NYC and for our new Batman. It’s effectively turning into a very long Law and Order episode because I’ve gotten word there’s corruption in the Mayor’s Office! Batman’s relationship with this makeshift task force continues to grow and just in time too, I’m getting word that Manray has more in store for us all…
A phone notification sounds with the Batman ‘66 theme.
Terrence: Oh no! I’m getting word that Manray is assaulting the Mayor! It’s a gnarly scene with multiple dead bodies and Manray hasn’t been apprehended yet. Police and Batman are on the way and I’m going to head to the scene to get details up close and personal. Let’s hope that’ll be the end of Manray’s reign of terror.
With a look to camera, Terrence gives a nod before the video feed cuts back to the studio. Not to Chad, but to Violet, with a big, welcoming smile on her face.
Violet: Hi guys, I’m thrilled to be back in the studio after a few weeks break. I’ve been following Harley and Ivy quite a lot lately and have updates on Poison Ivy’s whereabouts! Thanks to our drones funded by Queen Industries; I was able to pick up Ivy on the outskirts of Wyoming.
As we know Ivy has been through a lot lately. Being split in two and fused back together, becoming the most powerful she’s ever been, then reduced to hardly having any powers at all. It’s only fair we have a genuine voice on her behalf to speak out about why she has skipped town. Bella Garten, also known as the Gardener, was kind enough to take a call with me here today in the studio. We have her on the line. Bella, thanks again for joining us. Tell us, when was the last time you saw Pamela?
Bella: She came to me shortly after the attack on the city. She was troubled when discovering she could no longer sense the Green. I thought this was something she would have wanted, to not be consumed entirely by the Green, becoming no longer human. I was wrong. She’s going back to the start… where it all began.
Violet: Are you telling me, Ivy is going back to Jason Woodrue? The man who experimented on her resulting in poisonous and toxic abilities?!
Violet pauses for a moment, waiting for a response, but none comes, before continuing.
Violet: Well you heard it here first folks. Seems as if Ivy may be trying to meet Woodrue to obtain stronger powers once more. More reports from our drones show the death of a father and son, who’ve fallen victim to what I’m calling zombie flora. Of course, this imagery is far too explicit to show our viewers, however, I will say another two men were reported dead from the same cause only four hours later. Our drones got a nice close-up of the icky goods, I swear I think I saw one move. But again, waaaaay too gross to show you all. That’s all for now guys, I’ll be sure to pop in with any more updates. Back to you Cha-
Violet is cut off by a loud burp from Chad as the camera cuts back to the lead anchor’s desk in the studio.
Chad: Damn, y’all got meninists on this Earth? This dweeb Sisko or whatever needs an atomic wedgie. I may seem kinda fratty and overly flirtatious but believing that any gender is above another is prehistoric. And this weirdo is selling Milk+ for men. Does this Earth have the “Oedipus Complex” psychology thing too? It just seems like this dude has some weird thing about women. I hope Wonder Woman and her boyfriends beat his ass.
Someone off-camera calls to Chad who takes a sip from his beer before doing a spit take.
Chad: They’re NOT boyfriends? You’re full of shit. What are they, best friends? Roommates? I sure as hell know when two bros are doing the Cupid’s tongue shuffle. The Khandaq kissin. The Plastic man togue punch. Wait that one may actually be for… never mind. You get it. These two kings are Professor Pygin’ if you know what I mean.
Anyway, sounds like something called Titans Tower was just blown up by someone on a registered offender list. The villains have joined forces to take down the remaining heroes of the world which can never be a good sign. We usually call those things Wars in my universe but sounds more like a CRISIS over here. Things are a lot darker on this Earth. RIP to Beast Boy. I hope you can frolic in the green fields of Heaven greeny…
The transmission ends as Chad pours the rest of his beer out on the floor.
Books Covered This Week
- Dark Crisi #1 by Joshua Williamson, Daniel Sampere, Alejandro Sanchez, and Tom Napolitano.
- Batgirls #7 by Becky Cloonan, Michael W. Conrad, Robbi Rodriguez, Rico Renzi, and Becca Carey.
- Monkey Prince #5 by Gene Luen Yang, Bernard Chang, Marcelo Maiolo, and Janice Chiang.
- I Am Batman #10 by John Ridley, Christian Duce, Rex Lokus, and Troy Peteri.
- Poison Ivy #1 by G. Willow Wilson, Marcio Takara, Arif Prianto, and Hassan Otsmane-Elhaou.
- Wonder Woman #788 by Michael W. Conrad, Becky Cloonan, Emanuela Lupacchino, Wade von Grawbadger, Tamra Bonvillain, and Pat Brosseau.
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