If you missed last week’s news report, check it out here.
(Spoilers for DC Comics released 05/25/2021)
(Words in italics signal actions)
The GC52 Logo appears on televisions, computers, and all other types of viewing devices at its normally scheduled time. Lead Anchor Dan McMahon sits at the center of the newsroom behind his desk. This week he’s wearing a lot of sunscreen on his face, sunglasses on the back of his head in typical dad fashion, and a floral button-up that’s outlined by the large window behind him looking out over Metropolis. The Daily Planet globe is visible behind him as the setting sun sparkles off the crown jewel of the City of Tomorrow. The GC52 theme music begins to dim as the actual program begins.
Dan: Good Morning, Good Afternoon, and Good Evening to all our wonderful viewers from the docks of Coast City to the furthest reaches of Oa, you are watching the multiverse’s best news show that brings you the news that you need to know! As always, I’m your host, Dan McMahon, doing my part to bring you up to the minute updates on the worlds you live in!
Remember a few weeks back when I was talking about those Warworld ships invading our Earth? Well, it turns out the large one was full of refugees fleeing from the hellish planet and to Earth. Our linguistic experts have been decoding some footage before the Supermen saved the day. One of the people on the ship was speaking a dialect of Kryptonian, and believe you me, I was just as shocked as you were when they told me it was Kryptonian… Strange things are afoot. Let’s check in with Katie though.
The camera struggles to focus on Katie. It’s almost as if her face is blurring in the frame. Her hair is also jet black instead of its usual blonde. Additionally, she is wearing dark blue lipstick smudged on the corners as if she couldn’t be bothered to look in the mirror before she left to go on camera.
Katie: This camera is rolling right?
Her voice sounds warbling and monotone. Someone off-camera whispers, “What side of the universe did she wake up on this morning?”
Katie: The Batman and one of the Super-men — oh, wait. He’s the Superman. What makes him the most super of men? Huh. Anyway, the two friends — or are they foes? — broke into Martha Wayne’s manor last night. Ms. Lois Lane, Jimmy Olsen and Batman’s sidekick Robin were supposedly accompanying the two heroes. If you ask me, that’s a lot of civilians — and a literal child involved in this scheme to do… whatever they were planning to do to Martha and her poor *cough* wimpy *cough* son Bruce.
An explosion erupted from deep below the prestigious Wayne Manor. Superman was reported to have “packed a wallop” — who’s going around spewing old-timey jargon? Was it Robin? I bet it was Robin. Doesn’t that kid have homework to do?
Apparently, Martha Wayne shot Batman while Bruce cowered in fear behind his mommy. I mean, Batman and Robin bust into the house of the wealthiest woman in the city and probably broke a bunch of precious items too. Bruce was probably on the verge of a panic attack for god’s sakes. Martha had every right to blast that Bat right in the —
Someone signals from off-stage for Katie to stop talking. They mouth words to her and she looks slightly surprised.
Katie: What? What do you mean Martha Wayne isn’t alive? I just saw images of her sticking her own son with a needle as he transformed into a beefed-up monster who —
She stops speaking mid-sentence. Nodding her head in realization, she stifles a laugh.
Katie: Oops. Looks like I’m in the wrong dimension — again. Wrong timeline? A parallel universe? Who knows anymore?! Blasted Archivist . . . sayonara!
Suddenly, Katie fizzles offscreen like she’s been transported away. After a few seconds of silence and shock at the empty chair in the studio, the camera cuts away.
Dan: Every week… anyway… Violet was just here a moment ago… where did she get to? JERRY!
As the camera pans over to Violet she’s not sat at her desk but instead is ducked under her desk whispering loudly at a poor rat clutched in her hands.
Violet: Come on you little shit, take me to your leader!
She throws a glance up at the camera, rolls her eyes, and sits back in her chair with a frustrated sigh.
Violet: It’s not what it looks like, ok?! I promised you all exclusive Harley updates, so I’m doing exactly that! I’ll start from the beginning. Harley started this new community support group to help victims of the Joker War, but some orderlies that work for Hugo Strange ambushed the entire thing!
That’s not even the worst part, they kidnapped Kevin! Harley managed to escape their grasps which led to this epic van chase but she couldn’t save him. The last I saw of her, she retreated down into the sewer for cover.
Violet now holds the rat up to the camera.
Violet: After a while I found this little fella coming out from the way she went in and figured he must have witnessed something, right? Does anybody here speak rat or have Ratcatcher’s phone number? No? Okay, back to you Dan!
Violet glares at the rat as the camera pans back over to Dan.
Dan: Please, no one give her Ratcatcher’s number. Please. I don’t want rats in the office. We already have one over in Gotham in the Mayor’s seat. That’s right, we are getting POLITICAL.
The camera focuses on Dan as he leans over his desk.
Dan: Gotham City has lost the daughter of one of the most influential families in Gotham, the Worths. We mourn for the loss of Sarah Worth and our regards go out to her partner. Her father is causing all sorts of ruckus down in City Hall with the Mayor and his weak grasp on the city. We were told that Batman found the deceased but the police stormed the scene in their normal caveman-like fashion, contaminating the scene rather than working with the world’s best detective. It’s sick what Mayor Nakano is doing and the danger he keeps putting Gotham in…
But it looks like after he was kidnapped last week we finally have an idea of where Jake is. The fees for the lawyers keep going up every time something like this happens so I really hope this is the last kidnapping, death, best friend turns out to be a secret agent, whatever, we have to deal with. And now I’m saying that I just know something bad’s gonna happen.
Anyway… let’s take a look at the footage we got from… Lazarus Island? That’s not a real place is it Jerry?
The drone labeled GC52 and Property of Jerry turns on and begins to fly as it looks at two tables, one with a child and the other with GC52’s own Jake, both have holes where their hearts should be! The boy’s hole begins to close and he regains consciousness as a young white-haired woman in blue and orange greets him and they walk out together. After they are gone the hole through the chest of the reporter closes in an instant. He sits up instantly and the drone flies into his face.
Jake: WHAT THE HELL… OH HI FOLKS! I am reporting live from what I heard is called Lazarus Island home to the League of Lazarus, who are hosting a tournament of the deadliest fighters and someone saw me in my navy suit with a shirt that turned orange when I had some OJ spilled on me and they thought I was the Question! I was flattered then suddenly I had a hand through my chest courtesy of my new buddy, Brutale, who at least bought me breakfast first.
He gets off the table and throws on a black robe with glowing green writing on it and begins to walk out.
Jake: Now supposedly everyone here gets three deaths then they’re gone for good so meaning I have a few revives left, but sadly I don’t intend on staying here long enough to find out. I have a ferret to feed! Now… wait… there’s that boy, who was killed when I got here. Looks like he’s with the girl that ran him through and they’re breaking into something, I wonder what… Let me see if I can’t get us in there!
He rushes up to a wall and watches as two men open a door and when they’re in, he slinks through the opened door undetected. As he and the drone go down a staircase they find a glowing green liquid that looks eerily refreshing.
Jake: Hm I wonder what that stuff is…
Walking over, his foot is caught by a rock and he falls in! After a brief struggle, he realizes he can stand only for the camera to pick up the visage of a much younger Jake! He goes on with his reporting seemingly unphased by his unintentional sink or swim, but he seems a little more amped and unhinged.
Jake: WOW I FEEL GREAT! WOO, THAT WAS REFRESHING…
A noise startles him and Jake becomes visibly annoyed.
Jake: I AM TRYING TO RECORD HERE! GOD, THE NERVE OF SOME PEOPLE! WELL LIKE I WAS TRYING TO SAY, THAT SEEMS SAFE TO INTERACT WITH BUT I NEED TO GET HOME!
He grabs the drone and runs back outside. He begins running towards the water and as he gets in a wave hits him and washes him back on shore where a party is being held.
Jake: WOW A PARTY, ALRIGHT MIGHT AS WELL JOIN I! BACK TO YOU DAN!
The drone footage ends, and the camera feed returns to the studio where Dan has his face in his hands, mid-conversation with Jerry the inter.
Dan: -st don’t get it Jer. How does this keep happening. He was dead, and now he’s alive. Ugh, I guess this what we should expect dealing with supers week in and week out.
Oh, sorry folks, um… let’s go over to Bree while I gather my thoughts. It looks like she’s been hiding in… Titans Tower… Yeah, sure, let’s see.
The feed cuts to black for a second before the bright light of a flashlight washes over a face that’s hovering slightly off-center of the camera. The reporter known for power suits now dons an all-black catsuit and is shinning a flashlight below her chin. Bree appears to be in some sort of confined, dark space.
Bree: Well they say if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself! Too much is happening in Titans Tower for one set of eyes, so I’ve taken it upon myself to run backup. I’ve been living in the vent- ahem, I mean, I’ve been occupying an undisclosed location within the Tower and have not been explicitly told to vacate.
Anyways, to catch you up, the faculty Titans are absent for a mission of their own. What have the youngins been up to, unsupervised? What became of Superboy and Red X? That’s what I’m here to find out! I left for the Tower immediately after recording my last cast and seem to have arrived at just the right time for a little hallway rumble.
The camera angle adjusts to focus on the vent directly in front of the reporter. Although the video quality is poor, some sort of colorful conflict is possible to make out from between the slats.
Bree: The young Titans are being attacked by Red X, Superboy, and 2 other figures I haven’t been able to identify yet. One looks like….a steampunk owl…thing? The other has a very distracting metal helmet. It is unclear whether this is a surprise training exercise or an actual attack.
A loud BOOM echos through the vents and seems to rattle the whole structure. Bree is shaken slightly but manages to hold on to the flashlight. The noise lasts less than a minute and distant shouting is heard shortly after, although the exact dialogue is unclear.
Bree: WOW sorry about that folks, perhaps that was one of those boom tubes? Oh wait- I can make out some voices. The teachers are back, they don’t sound happy. Something about… one of the young Titans… KILLING?!?! OH… she swears she wasn’t going to… and now she’s… QUITTING?!?! Hmmm… some are trying to talk her out of it… doesn’t seem to be working… and now… whispers…
The reporter has more or less put her ear to the vent, she continues in a whisper tone.
Bree: The action is over and making too much noise threatens to give away my location. I don’t have a good feeling about any of this, but, I must end the broadcast. ‘Till next time!
The camera abruptly cuts to black. When the camera cuts back to the office, Dan is wearing a bucket hat and has his sunglasses on.
Dan: You may be wondering why I am all sunblocked and beached out, well I was invited to a NICE HOUSE ON THE LAKE on another Earth by a very nice gentleman. I met him at a cocktail hour on Earth BL and he asked me to swing by for the weekend for Memorial Day. I will tell you how it goes next week. But for now, that’s all we have for you, so as always… be it the Bat Symbol in Gotham, a red streak through Central City, or a golden lasso on Themyscira… GC52 has you covered with the news you need to know. Till next week, I’m your host Dan McMahon. Be strong in all your convictions.
Books covered this week:
- Action Comics #1031 by Phillip Kennedy Johnson, Daniel Sampere, Adriano Lucas, and Dave Sharpe.
- Batman/Superman #18 by Gene Luen Yang, Ivan Reis, José Luís, Danny Miki, Jonas Trindade, Sabine Rich, and Saida Temofonte.
- Harley Quinn #3 by Stephanie Phillips, Riley Rossmo, Ivan Plascencia, and AndWorld.
- Robin #2 by Joshua Williamson, Gleb Melnikov, Luis Guerrero, and ALW’s Troy Peteri.
- Teen Titans Academy #3 by Tim Sheridan, Rafa Sandoval, Jordi Tarragona, Max Raynor, Alejandro Sanchez, Alex Sinclair, and Rob Leigh.
- Detective Comics #1036 by Mariko Tamaki, Dan Mora, Jordie Bellaire, and Aditya Bidikar.