Marvel Swimsuit Special: Friends, Foes, and Rivals #1 Review

It feels like the dry, sexless nature of the Marvel Cinematic Universe has made a lot of people forget just how inherently horny the concept of the superhero is. Superbabes and Ultrahunks in outfits that leave little to the imagination are just inherently hot, and the pages of comic books are the perfect place for equal-opportunity four-color fantasies. Such a tongue-in-cheek thirstiness is nowhere better exemplified than Marvel’s infamous Swimsuit Specials from the early Nineties. It’s no surprise that comic book fans and creators alike have yearned for its return for years, including those of us who weren’t around the first time to explain to our parents that we read the annual collection of pinups for the articles. Needless to say, the return of the Marvel Swimsuit Special has been long awaited. So, does it live up to the hype?

I guess it kind of depends on what your expectations are going into this. I mean, there are a lot of gorgeous images of scantily-clad superpeople for every sexuality, and I really appreciate how even though this was published three decades after the original Marvel Swimsuit Special, there’s no apparent attempt to turn down the heat. It’s refreshing how steamy this is allowed to be, especially considering how much effort Disney has put into making Marvel a safe, uncontroversial “brand” over the last few years.

My issue is that I’m just not sure how much of the art in this special was made specifically for it. When I got to John Tyler Christopher’s stunning Elsa Bloodstone and Jeff Coppertone homage (my favorite piece in this collection), I instantly recognized it as one of the variant covers from Kelly Thompson’s 2019 Deadpool run. There were also a few more variants that I’d seen before, and it had me wondering if any of the art outside of the framing device story were never-before-seen.

On one hand, I get why Marvel would want to reprint variant covers in the special. There’s such a high quantity of them that chances are most fans never see a lot of them,  much less get the chance to buy and display them. I mean, I guess I’m glad there’s an affordable way for readers to get some of these pinups and hang them on their walls, but I kind of had my hopes up for something a little fresher.

I also felt like the fifteen-page framing story comic takes up way too much of the issue for something that barely has any superheroes in swimsuits. I’ve always liked Nick Bradshaw’s playful artstyle in things like Wolverine and the X-Men, but Tim Seeley and Tony Fleec’s script barely plays to his prowess in drawing big butts and bigger muscles. Most of the story is just fairly generic battles against superheroes in their basic costumes and Marvel baddies like the Hand and AIM. While these scenes are competently rendered, they aren’t what anyone is buying a Swimsuit Special for. Also, it doesn’t help that one of those fifteen pages is Janet van Dyne’s hands holding an iPad with the issue’s Adam Hughes cover on it. It’s a beautiful cover, but it feels like a waste of real estate to have a whole page that’s basically the same as what’s on the outside of the book.

I guess I like that the framing story starred the Wasps (Janet and her adopted daughter, Nadia) and how it heavily clowns on AI generated imagery. It’s good to see that Marvel is taking an open stance against it, because the day they embrace that shit is the day I finally go full Sarah Connor. The comic isn’t without fun moments– like the Punisher having traumatic flashbacks to that time he wore a skull speedo– but I’m genuinely baffled that it doesn’t have more superheroes in swimsuits. Maybe next time the Avengers can recruit heroes that are already on the beach?

I don’t hate this special. I mean, how could I hate something that has that Nic Klein art of a freckled Valkyrie sunbathing in a chainmail bikini? I just think that there’s a lot that Marvel needs to do differently if the special comes back next year. As it stands, Friends, Foes, and Rivals underestimates how much readers are here to oogle over their favorite characters in swimwear and overestimates how much they’re reading it for the plot.